也许作为一个自己也参加活动的人,不应该对别人的翻译说三道四,但有些话还是忍不住想说一下,或者只是稍微整理一下自己的思路吧。
我所考虑的先是翻译风格,其实这段不是歌词,不是诗歌,尽量自然一点好,最初最后一句,我时翻成“莫过于以为现实中的生活,便是生活应有的模样”,念了一遍之后骤然发现句句押韵,太装了,于是改成了“莫过于以为现实中的生活,就是生活应该有的样子”。虽然某人依然觉得我翻得太文绉绉,但是,这段话是诗人Cervantes变身死疯子Don Quixote的时候说的,所以,我还是译得偏“文”一点了,但个人觉得还算是比较适合念白的,想不到看到的大部分翻译比我的还要文。
顺便说一下现在很多古风翻译歌词什么的,只是看起来很美,大部分都不能细读,而且造就了一种非常矫情的翻译风格,我真的很不喜欢。
另外,这段独白是有上下文的,前面是Cervantes跟牢房里的人谈到疯子与现实生活的问题,然后引出Cervantes说了一段很长的独白:
I have lived nearly fifty years, and I have seen life as it is. Pain, misery, hunger … cruelty beyond belief. I have heard the singing from taverns and the moans from bundles of filth on the streets. I have been a soldier and seen my comrades fall in battle … or die more slowly under the lash in Africa. I have held them in my arms at the final moment, These were men who saw life as it is, yet they died despairing. No glory, no gallant last words … only their eyes filled with confusion, whimpering the question; “Why?” I do not think they asked why they were dying, but why they had lived.
然后Cervantes再说出这一段独白,而且逐渐融到Don Quixote的角色里,所以,如果不放在这个环境里,我很喜欢7h翻的意思与措辞:
如果生活已变得荒谬,那什么叫疯谁说了算?向现实屈服可能是疯了,不再做梦可能是疯了,在稻草堆里找珍珠可能是疯了,活着看太透可能是疯了,而把现状当作生活的本貌,认为就这个样了的想法则是所有之中疯得最最彻底的。
但我感觉是,这种措辞比较适合放在一个与别人争论的环境里面,而不是特别适合作为独白。
另外就是最后一句的意思,前面几句,不同的版本翻得其实都大同小异,基本上都只是修辞上的区别,但最后一句,尤其是to see life as it is。似乎大家的都各有理解,有些可能还有些偏差,在意思上,7h说“把现状当作生活的本貌”和yajun说 “存在就是合理”是比较准确的,不过这句话在上文的对话中有出现过,就在Cervantes讲出那段长独白之前,
THE DUKE说了一句话
A man must come to terms with life as it is!
我之所以后来把最后一句改成“莫过于接受现实,而不去想生活应该是什么样子”,原因就是想要跟这句话对应。当然,最后也许还要看这句话要怎么翻。我对自己这个翻译其实也不太满意。我这里说的,只是一个翻译整体性的问题。(所以,单抽一段出来翻译,是不是还要介绍一下上下文背景比较好?)
最后,我居然把前面一段也翻出来了,最后又改了一点,我真是闲啊……(当然其实前面也还有,不过这里意思应该完整了)
THE DUKE
( With tolerant contempt)
This La Mancha–what is it like?
这个拉曼查,是个什么样的地方?
THE GOVERNOR
An empty place. Great wide plains.
空空荡荡的,是个很大的平原。
PRISONER
A desert.
是个沙漠
THS GOVERNOR
A wasteland.
不毛之地
THE DUKE
Which apparently grows lunatics.
显然,这种地方盛产疯子
CERVANTES
I would say, rather… men of illusion.
我想,我会用这个词,充满幻想的人
THE DUKE
Much the same. Why are you poets so fascinated with madmen?
其实都一样。为什么你们这些诗人都那么喜欢疯子?
CERVANTES
I suppose… we hare much m common¡£
我想,我们有很多共同之处。
THB DUKE
You both turn your backs on life.
你们都闭上眼睛,不去看现实的生活
CERVANTES
We both select from life what pleases us.
我们都是在选择我们所喜欢的生活
THE DUKE
A man must come to terms with life as it is!
但一个人是必须接受现实的!
CERVANTSS
I have lived nearly fifty years, and I have seen life as it is. Pain, misery, hunger … cruelty beyond belief. I have heard the singing from taverns and the moans from bundles of filth on the streets. I have been a soldier and seen my comrades fall in battle … or die more slowly under the lash in Africa. I have held them in my arms at the final moment, These were men who saw life as it is, yet they died despairing. No glory, no gallant last words … only their eyes filled with confusion, whimpering the question; “Why?” I do not think they asked why they were dying, but why they had lived.
我已经差不多50岁了,我知道什么叫做现实,痛苦,悲惨,饥饿……你无法相信那是多么残酷。我听过人们在简陋的小酒馆里唱歌,在肮脏的街头痛苦地呻吟,我曾经当过兵,亲眼看到自己的同袍战死沙场,或者,在非洲受尽折磨,慢慢地死去,在他们临死前,我把他们抱在怀里,这些人已经接受现实了,但是,他们却在绝望中死去,没有尊严与荣耀,没有豪迈的遗言,他们的眼中充满疑惑,他们呜咽着问出这个问题“为什么?”我知道,他们不是在问他们为什么要死,而是在问他们为什么活在这个世界上。
When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies? Perhaps to be too practical is madness. To surrender dreams–this may be madness. To seek treasure where there is only trash. Too much sanity may be madness. And maddest of all, to see life as it is and not as it should be.
如果生活本身已经是这么荒谬,那么谁能知道什么才是疯狂?也许过于实际就是疯狂;也许放弃梦想就是疯狂;也许在只有垃圾的地方寻找珍宝就是疯狂;又也许,过于清醒才是疯狂。而最疯狂的,莫过于接受现实,而不去想生活应该是什么样子。
其实我也同意yajun关于“疯狂”这个词的意见,但是说“发疯”又觉得有一点点怪……
再读N遍之后,居然觉得把“疯狂”换成“发疯”其实也挺好的。



